Monday, April 28, 2008
I am in the playroom cutting out an apron to sew. I am literally steps away from her.
Her: "Mom, can I play with this thing in the tub?"
Me, without going in there to look : "Well, I don't know honey. What is it?"
Her: "Just this thing here in the bathroom."
Me, thinking what she could possibly be talking about, but again, not going to look: "Uh, well, I guess so."
Her: "Ok! Good!"
Her singing: "I am dusting, I am dusting, yes I am" to the tune of "Where is Thumbkin?"
Me: "What is it that you are dusting with?"
Her: "This white thing mom!"
Me, casually walking into the bathroom: "What... oh my word! Put that down! What are you thinking? You DO NOT PUT THE TOILET BOWL BRUSH IN THE TUB WITH YOU!!!!! GROSS!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Fortunately I just bought it. I mean, I had used it one time, but it was fairly... sort of.. kind of...clean.
Would it have been ok for me to spray her with Lysol at that point without DSS coming? Or perhaps scalding water?
I didn't know which would have been worse in their eyes.
The bath with the bowl brush, the Lysol or the scalding water..... really, it's a toss up.
I really like the nests! Especially the one with the colorful eggs!!
This is my guest bedroom! The bed does not have a headboard and so I decided to add these windows to give the room a little "umph". My house is a lot of reds, golds and greens, but I love shabby chic stuff. I wanted to add a few shabby elements, and I found these at a flea market.
I also had this pearl monogram that I really like and I love ribbon so I thought I would attach it.
Anyone want to chime in? Give suggestions?
Saturday, April 26, 2008
It has been a good week. A hard week, but a good week! That kind of doesn't make sense, but when you are able to see God at work, even in the hard times... well, it's good. Hard, but good. See?
Will you please pray for a meeting that we are having next Wednesday night for parents and volunteers that deal with kids with special needs? We are asking God to do a NEW work among our families and we will match up "Buddies" with kids that need extra help in Sunday school. Oh, friends! It's so good to see it come together!! I just love it!
I also had a great time at a women's conference this weekend! Priscilla Shirer came and spoke and it was just fabulous!
I really needed the special prayer time at the beginning of the weekend. It was an amazing time of worship and prayer as women of different colors, shapes, sizes and situations wrote prayer requests and placed them on the altar. Just to have that time to be real and open before the Lord was so refreshing. And to see those women in prayer made me realize that we all face things that we need Him to touch!
It was just a time to pour out my heart about the choices that we are facing. It gave me time to go back and read the promises that He gave me this year as we faced starting school and be reassured that He is STILL the same God! And then to know that women were taking those cards and praying over them just really brought such a peace. Knowing that you are being lifted to the Father is a humbling thing!
I know that the Lord spoke to every woman this weekend. Several of our girls from Sunday school went and we got to sit together. One thing that stood out to me was when Priscilla said that they had prayed that the Lord would bring those women that were serious about moving forward with Him to the conference. It made me feel so good to see 7 of our girls standing there worshipping together! I know a few wanted to come that couldn't and when you add those in... well, it just makes you feel great to know that you have friends that are seeking the same thing in their lives!
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
If you have a child with any sort of special need you are always on pins and needles that someone might reject them in someway. They may feel that they do not have the resources or the man power to handle your situation and it is hard to face the fact that someone might not be able to handle your child!
When I taught school I taught Special Ed for 4 years and then "regular" school for 4 years. As a teacher you are concerned for every child and I understand the feeling of "WHAT can I do to help them succeed? They are all so different!!" If you have a child in your classroom that is REALLY difficult to understand or has a very hard time learning, it makes your job even harder. I mean... Caroline is not the only child in there that needs to learn so they have to consider the teacher's ability to keep her up to speed along with 19 other kids. It's a huge responsibility!
As a parent, though, it's Caroline that I am concerned with. Not the other 19 so much. I mean, I do care about them, but ultimately Caroline's education is my responsibility so she is my focus. It's hard to hear that some of her immature behaviors might keep her from being a part of the classroom. Her bathroom issues, her need to be redirected, her need to be tested separately, her need for extended time on things... all play into the decisions that teachers need to make as they think of the classroom as a whole.
Some of the questions that we have to ask is: How will they compensate for her? What will the assistant in the classroom do to help? Do we need Special Ed to come into play more than they currently do?
You know, you never want to be a burden to anyone. But to be honest, when you have a child with special needs you sometimes feel like a burden. I do not mean this in a negative sense, but it isn't like you can just walk in and be a part of the classroom. Special considerations have to be made and it makes it hard sometimes. It's hard to face. It's hard to understand. It's hard to accept. It's just plain hard.
I do NOT KNOW what I would do if I did not know the Lord! How would I cope with this if I could not cry out to Him? He made her! He has all things in His hands, and He knows what is best! I will trust... as we go into this meeting... that He is already there and He already sees the best for my Caroline. I will hand it all to Him and seek His plan for her life. I might have to hand it to him 87 times today, but I will do it and I will trust that the God of the Universe...the God of Creation... my covenant keeping Father God who knit her together for His purpose is in 100% control!
Thank you LORD! You DO understand. Nothing is hard for You! You are the one that created Caroline and You are the one who knows all things. You put our lives in motion and You sustain us with every breath that we take. Nothing is too hard for You and You have a plan and a purpose for us and for Caroline. Please reveal Your perfect plan to us and to the teachers that will meet with us today! We need You Lord. You are our guide and our refuge! We love You and thank You that Your hand is not shortened and Your will will be done! Amen!
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
Ok... I was tagged by Jennifer to do this little thing called "7 Random Things" and here's what you do...
1) Link to your tagger and post these rules on your blog
2) Share 7 facts about yourself on your blog, some random, some weird
3) Tag 7 people at the end of your post by leaving their names as well as links to their blogs
4) Let them know they are tagged by leaving a comment on their blog.
So, weird/random things about me...
1) I taught high school special ed. right out of college. I do not recommend this to the "normal" general population
2)My hair is really, really curly and when I let it dry by itself I am AFROLICIOUS!
3)I graduated with 832 people and I lived in a small town called Irmo.
4) I can chest press 70lbs. with free weights... 35lbs in each hand.
5) I owned 3 Honda Preludes in a row. One black and two reds.
6) I love to eat chocolate chip cookies, chocolate brownies, chocolate donuts, chocolate ice cream, chocolate pie, chocolate candy... chocolate, chocolate, chocolate!
7)My husband and I love to go to bed early sometimes and just read quietly.
I don't know if those are really weird, but they are random so I guess I met the criteria.
Ok... my seven tags are The Nester, Chatting at the Sky, Val, joy-ful-ness... well, that's not 7 but it's close! All of my friends have been tagged already! :)
Monday, April 21, 2008
One thing that I did learn this weekend is that Jesus loves me.
Well, I mean, I knew it already, but this weekend at church our pastor talked about the fact that God has a plan for our lives.
Okay, I knew that too, but you know how it is when you get in a rut?
I feel like since we ended our Beth Moore study I have just been floundering around... just sort of praying and reading, but not getting any real meat! Well, it helped me so much just to be reminded of the simple truth that God has a plan for me and that in order to know His plan I have got to be plugged in! NO FLOUNDERING!
Then we head to Sunday school and I loved hearing that our Heavenly Father really wants such a relationship with us that He wants us to call Him by name! When we pray... not just any old name will do. Jesus loves me so much that He wants to spend time with me! It was good to be reminded that when we use someone's name to address them it is showing a relationship, a sign of respect and familiarity. AND it's the same with God.
You know, you hear people say "The Big Guy" or "The Man Upstairs," but honestly those terms are showing that the person really does not know God at all! When we call Him LORD (all caps) we are saying that He is a covenant keeping God. And when we call Him Jehovah Rafa we are saying that He is our healer. What relationship when we know those things about Him and can call out to Him with words that describe His character! It is just awesome to know that He wants to reveal Himself to us through the names that represent who He is, but I have to be in my Bible to know those things about Him.
I just really needed this Sunday at church. It was such good reminder that God is a personal God. He loves me in spite of my sin and He wants to spend time with me to help me know Him more. Sometimes it is the simple, back to the basics, sort of things that we need. The theology and original Greek and Hebrew terms are wonderful things to learn, but sometimes I just need to hear that Jesus loves me.
And ... He loves you too.
What did you learn at church this weekend? Share a simple truth that might help encourage others!
Friday, April 18, 2008
Wednesday, April 16, 2008
I got a new camera!!!!!!!!!! Oh, yes ma'am I did.
All bitterness... gone.
The sweetest husband in the world (yes he is...do not argue!) said I could.
Guess what else?
Tomorrow is graduation picture day at kindergarden!
Can you handle the sweetness of that?
Not sure I can.
I am going.
With my new camera.
Photos will soon appear.
Because I have a new camera.
And another thing?
We are having a Mommy and Me Tea and Fashion Show at our church this weekend.
The Caroline is a model!
Wonder if you will see pictures of that?
It's a mystery yet to be seen.
She got student of the month!
Again, photos of one kind of cute kid will appear. Ok, REALLY cute kid.
Are you sick of this?
I, kind of, am.
Just needed the internet world to know that I am no longer bitter.
I did pitch a tiny fit.
I was by myself so only God saw.
Bitterness and fits are reason to ask for forgiveness.
I had to do that too.
It has been a good week for me.
Just realizing that my silly bitternesses and fits really show how shallow I can be.
And how big God is.
And I am glad He's big because sometimes... I am SO not big.
The end. Thank you.
Tuesday, April 15, 2008
Here are a few things that have really seemed to help:
1) PRAY! I am telling you! To know that we can lift our daughter to her MAKER is out-of-this- world- incredible! He made her, He knows every single detail of her DNA, He knows what she needs when she needs it, He knows which teacher is best for her, He knows which therapy day is best... HE KNOWS IT ALL! He is GOD!!
2)Find a scripture that speaks to your situation with your child and pray it for them. My scripture is Isaiah 54:13, "All your sons will be taught by the Lord, and great will be your children's peace." See remembering things were hard for Caroline at first and in school you have to remember what you learned last week so that you can build on it this week. She was also so overwhelmed that she could not settle herself enough to focus on what was being taught. Well, I began to pray that if it was hard for the teacher to get it across to Caroline that the Lord would intervene and use that teacher's words to help it make sense. Or that He would just speak directly to Caroline's heart during class. ANYTHING, LORD! Just please be her teacher so that she can learn and grow!!
Caroline was also very overwhelmed by all of the stimulus around her. 20 children, decorations, chairs, a schedule, noises, colors, letters, crafts... are all wonderful, but if you have a hard time with taking it all in... not so wonderful! So I prayed that the Lord would give her peace and that He would be calming to her in the midst of what seems like chaos to her.
I also posted this scripture on her bedroom door and I pray it for her every day on the way to school. HE is answering and I am one grateful mama!
3) Get a trampoline and a swing set! Yea, I know. You SWORE that your kid would NEVER have a trampoline! Me too. But these kids need that bouncing or swinging motion to help them organize their bodies. I KNOW!!!!!!! It sounds like the weirdest thing, but if you talk to a therapist who can really explain all of the ins and outs of these kids they will tell you that they have a hard time organizing themselves. There is something about the bouncing and swinging that calms them and helps them to focus. BELIEVE ME! It is worth it!!!!!!!
We got a small trampoline (8ft. round) instead of the normal 13 ft. round. It does not take up as much space and it does not allow 59 kids to get on it so you feel a little safer. AND it has the pads and a net.
To be honest. Besides therapy and school, those three are the biggest things that we have done for our Caroline. There are other things that have helped (and to keep this from being a book I will share them at another time) but prayer, claiming God's Word in her life, and a trampoline and swing set have been wonderful things for our family.
Sounds kind of funny, but it's true.
Lord, thank you for being all that we need. You HAVE been Caroline's teacher and You ARE her peace. She knows that she is being prayed for and she knows that You answer prayer.
Please be with those moms who are struggling to know how to help their kids. God it is so hard!! Hear their prayers Lord. Be THEIR peace. Show them Your perfect plan for them and if they don't know You Lord... please speak to their hearts now. Help them to sense You tugging at their hearts and show them Your forgiveness... the wonderful gift of salvation through Jesus Christ Your Son! Help them to pursue You with their very lives Lord.
I love You Jesus! Amen!!
Saturday, April 12, 2008
Friday, April 11, 2008
(The guest bedroom is called "Mimi's Room" because my mom and dad are the only ones that sleep there when they occasionally visit so it has a name... it's only right to name the downstairs bath!)
I do love it and I have sense added a shelf that has some great nests sitting on it.. However, my camera is STILL broken so I can't show it to you. How much do I hate that?? I am STILL bitter!
So here's a fun wall paper I was considering...
OR we could try this one:
I sort of like the blue one because my kitchen is blue and it would bring some of that color into another part of my house.
I also think the design is fabulous and sort of formal without being stuffy. Hate the stuffiness. And my husband refuses to live in a museum.
Which reminds me of the time that my mom redecorated in their old house and she bought this tall slim table and she got a bust of a man's head to put on it. I thought my husband was going to choke to death. He thought he was in a museum and he said so each time we visited. THAT was interesting.
Ok, stop getting me off track.
So anyway, I think that the blue bath would also bring some life into the Birdbath since it is just a golden yellow right now.
In other news... through a series of events I found an old friend today! It was really amazing how it all worked and she posted a blog about it here. She even posted a photo of our old youth group and it is quite a sight to see!
She even lives in my town! For Pete's sake... she lives in MY PART of my town! We have never crossed paths or anything and I am just totally amazed that we figured out that we were posting comments on each other's blogs and hellooooooooooo... I think I know you!
So that was just amazing!
THEN... I have not posted about this because I was trying to get past the drama... we went to the dentist with the Caroline two days ago to have a teeny tiny cavity filled. Here's the play by play:
She stiffed armed us.
I made her lay down.
She pulled at the dentist's hands.
She gagged more.
She threw up.
We cleaned her up.
We went to the dentist's office.
We decided that we will have to go to the stinkin' hospital to get two little cavities filled so that the decay does not spread to her permanent teeth.
I called my husband.
I cried more.
Wednesday, April 9, 2008
Junior Hill was an older pastor that spoke last night and his sermon was really intriguing! I loved this point:
"Process must never be mistaken for purpose."
He was preaching on heartaches and how everyone goes through them. "Heart aches are not unselective, but are common to man."
He was sharing that we must never mistake the process that we must endure for the purposes that God has for us. The process is not always fun or easy, but His purposes are higher and they are never to hurt you! He proposes to help us and the purpose for us!
Pastor Hill also explained that we have a hard time seeing what God is doing when we are in the middle of the process. His hand is not hurried and He wants us to be slow in passing judgement on others because we never know when they are enduring the process.
When I look back over processes I have endured I realize just how right he is! God's hand will not move faster through our circumstance just because we pitch a fit or cry in anguish. It is not His plan to fit our time table or meet our every single want when we think they should be met. Sometimes it's hard because we think we might not make it one more day if He does not intervene, but the entire time He is there... carrying us, hearing our cries and developing a testimony for Him!
Some processes are pure anguish. The loss of a job, the longing for a child, the loss of a child, the never ending illness of a dying loved one... all press us in on every side! They hurt and we desperately cry out in pain for our Abba Daddy to give us relief! And yet He is there meeting our needs in the ways that we might not see.
Process. Where are you in YOUR process with God? How is He carrying you and are you trusting Him?
Such amazing questions that require a moment with our Father. Cry out to Him and walk through the process together.
I love you Lord. Thank you for being with me through the process. For holding my hand and drying my tears. Forgive me for doubting Your perfect will for me and help me to trust You. My life is a process that needs to be fully handed to You. Help me Lord. Be with my friends going through a process as they trust You. You know each one by name and each process by every detail they face. Carry them Lord.
Tuesday, April 8, 2008
AAHHH carline. Nope. Don't miss it.
It's funny. We went to a favorite little lunch place today...just me and the Caroline.. and walked in to ALL sorts of folk who had the same idea. As soon as we walked in one of our friends greeted us with "It's Spring Break.... and we are ALL here... to get our kids out beforewekillthem! Good to see you!" IT'S TUESDAY PEOPLE! And summer is coming! Oh goodness.
My friend Nicki (www.threegirlygirlz.blogspot.com) had an entire post about things to do for the week that would not involve lots of money. Now, THAT is a thinking mama. (ya'll need to teach me how to do the whole linky thing.. you know I am not techy... farthest thing from it girls!)
So tomorrow we are headed to the dentist. SHHHHHHHHHHHH! DO NOT TELL Caroline!! Girlfriend threw up in the parking lot one time because she hates it so much!
BUT she has two cavities and we GOTTA go. I will certainly have drama to blawg about.
BUT no camera mind you or you KNOW I would do photos.
Still not bitter. No ma'am I am not.
Anyhoo... just saying there's nothing going on... and I am kind of glad for once. :)
Monday, April 7, 2008
Not to mention that last year I had my camera either stolen or I lost it on Father's Day.
So needless to say that my camera record isn't real good AND I have had MANY photo ops that would have been priceless on the old blawg. (You think my husband will rush out and get me a new one? I am thinking NOT!)
Like my friend Jennifer's (http://www.homewardboundbridges.blogspot.com/) little boy sporting my daughter's heart shaped head phones. SO precious. Yea, that would have been precious on a blawg.
Or maybe the other night when I went out with my friends. I don't get to see this group of friends a whole lot! It would have been GREAT to have a photo of them and then share it with the blawging world. Sure would have been nice.
OR the fact that my kid lost another tooth last night. Can I take a picture of it?
I am not bitter. Not bitter at all.
Saturday, April 5, 2008
Now we know this and so does she so she just stays away while we are getting ready.
Friday, April 4, 2008
SO here's what I did. :)
My dining room was just a dark redish brown room with no pictures on our biggest wall. I can't afford a buffet or any more furniture right now so I framed some old calendar pages that my sister-in-law found at a flea market and this is what I did. You can't really see the detail, but they are fruit botanicals. An improvement, but still a little plain. Don't you think?
I think it looks ok. I still have no curtains in this room and I sometimes think it's too dark, but the pics lightened it up a bit with the beige mats. Any thoughts?
I also had some towels hanging over the toilet in my downstairs bath and I was tired of it. SO I found some bird pictures and these little glass plate things that look old and have ribbons for hangers. Here's what it looks like.
There is a blank wall to the right of it, and my six year old (with HER expert decorator advice!) thinks I should move it all to the blank wall. I also found a nest that has pretty eggs in it and I want to find a little shelf for it. There are lots of bird things out there now so I could go crazy!!
This is fun! My poor husband. I can't get too sassy yet! He might seriously kill me. Well... at least give me the evil how-much-money-did-all-of-this-cost eye.
I also have some fabric that I bought when my friend Faith made her curtains (www.walkwithmebyfaith.blogspot.com) and I trimmed the selvages and stopped at that! I gotta get the courage to keep going!! I have sewn some but never something with so much fabric! Oh. My. Word.! It's a lot more than a yard 'o fabric girls. Just a little intimidating. WHAT was I thinking?
It's just I know that if I want to change somethings I can't afford to have it made so I gotta do it myself.
Unless my ship came in and then I would get me a decorator and we would go to town!
Haven't heard any whistles from a boat lately though.
I think I can, I think I can. Pray for me.
Thursday, April 3, 2008
BO! I am a little sad that our most recent women's Bible study is coming to an end! Some of my sweetest friends have been gathering each week to read God's Word together and I have really loved it.
Our friend Katie has opened her beautiful home for us every week and has little treats for us every time we darken her door. Last week it was blue berry muffins! (Oh, yes it was. They were still warm.. delish!) At Easter she and her little boy made us cookies and it was so precious! Her little guy was so proud!! I wish I had some pictures to share because Katie has done a fabulous job at making us feel welcome. Good ol' Suthern hospitality girlfriends!
We have started each week on our faces before the Lord and let me tell you... humbling! We have shed tears as we have tried to climb the ascent of a closer walk and worship with and for our Lord. While it has been humbling and emotional at times.. I dare say that none of us would have changed it for the world!
I am always at a loss when I finish something like this. I never know what to do next. It's like part of my life is missing. The accountability to do my homework and have myself prepared each week is challenging, but wonderful!! I love it when I am learning something meaningful along side those that I love. It gives our conversation more meaning and our hearts a kindred spirit because we are walking the same road. When it's done... I know I am closer to the Lord and to my precious friends, but I am also sort of lost. Just left hungering for more I suppose.
The other thing that I miss is being able to catch up on all that my friends face each week. It is really an honor to lift them to the Lord in prayer and see Him work in their lives. Some of us keep up better than others, and I know that is just how it is. We get busy. And this time has been specifically set aside for the past seven weeks so that nothing else gets in the way. When the time is over we go back to life as we know it and I miss not hearing from everyone every week. It just means that I have to be more intentional with my friendships and yet it is so worth it to me to have these ladies as my friends.
So as we close out this study I just want to challenge us all to never stop! We are so much better for the journey and so much stronger when we walk it together! I can't wait to see how the Lord will answer the many prayers that we have lifted to Him and it is exciting to grow along side such precious women of God.
Now.. when does the next one start?? Anyone??
Lord, thank you for the opportunity to know you more and thank you for my friends! I can not express the gratitude that I have, for You have blessed me beyond words! Thank you for being a Holy God who inhabits the praise of His people! You are worthy of all that we are and all that we are yet to be! I pray that You are honored with our efforts to bow before You and be humbled as we recognize Your place as God and Lord. We love You! Please do not let the end of this study signify the end of our pursuit of You and Your Word. Amen.
Tuesday, April 1, 2008
Last night Caroline realized that she had left a school book in the car. (She can not check out another one if she does not return the one she checked out. This is, apparently, a big deal so she was on a mission to get this book into her bookbag.) Well, the car was in the garage and the door was down and the light in the garage just burned out. There was not a speck of light from anywhere.
I can hear her talking to herself. "The light won't come on. It's dark."
"MOM! What's wrong with the light?"
"Well the light burned out and daddy has to fix it. He just hasn't gotten to it yet."
Talking to herself again. "I just have to go to the car and get my book."
In a few minutes here she comes into the kitchen with her book.
"Mom, I got it. I am going to put it in my bookbag so that tomorrow I will be all ready for school."
"Wow Caroline. You went out in the garage and got that all by yourself."
"Well, you were brave! I know you are afraid of the dark, but you went out there and did it all by yourself! You are brave!"
She gasped out loud! "I am brave?" she asked.
"Yes you are honey!"
"Well, mom! Then Jesus answered your prayer! You asked Him to make me brave and He did it! Praise the Lord!"
Oh my word.
Thank you Jesus! She is seeing You in the every day and praising You! What more could I ever ask for?