Pages

Friday, June 27, 2014

Just Real Life

They came in explaining that someone had advised them to come to us for help.

“We are from a battered women’s shelter, and we need some clothes?” They both looked tired and one had holes in the seat of her pants.

They begin to register and one lady says, “I have 4 kids and they are with my mom. My husband is no good. I’m not shopping for him. I didn’t want them (kids) at the shelter with me. Too much to see. Too rough. Too crowded. Can I get clothes for them? I have a job, and I am on a long list to get my own housing. We are just in a rough kinda way, but it’s going to work out. I have to be patient.”

Just behind them another family enters. It’s a man, woman and a little boy and an older lady. The older lady stares at me and then a small smile. I smile at her and speak. She just says, “Hi.” in a very small voice.

The woman, her daughter, begins, “This is my mom. She just came to stay with us and has Alzheimer's. My brother was suppose to be caring for her, but wasn’t. I had to go get her and bring her to our home. She came with just the clothes on her back. Do you think you can help us? I won’t take clothes for anyone else… just her. This is a lot. It’s overwhelming.”

Behind them a couple of women carrying small children, and one walking along side, enters. They do not speak English, and they look around a little concerned that they won’t be able to tell us of their needs.

As the faces come in and stand in front of me… needing help in more ways than one… God is sometimes silently strong. I don’t always “hear” Him speak in every situation, but the reminder of who He is and how He alone is ABLE to meet every need that all of us have is always in my heart.

Over and over again I am also reminded that WE… humanity… people of every color and creed… people of every nationality and tongue have the same needs. No one is exempt from the need to be loved, have a place to call theirs and to have that place in their heart… that place of emptiness, filled.

The lady with Alzheimer's was struggling with how her clothes felt on her skin. She only wanted pants with drawstrings. Her daughter looked doubtful and said, “I am sure it’s hard to “put in an order” but is there any way you might have pants like this? I just haven’t been able to find any for her and I just lost my job!! I just can’t go spend tons of money!”

I walk to the back where we have a little bit of summer stock. It’s not likely that I will find the pants but I pray, “Lord, you know this need. Please direct me to these pants if they are in the building!”

I start with maternity pants thinking that I might find some that are small and might work.

No. There’s nothing.

I go to the few shorts that we have, but they all button.

As I begin to walk back to the front of the store I remember the pairs of capri pants that we’d just gotten in. I look… and look and..

yes. There are two pair.

I walk to the front (well almost skipped!) and I tell the daughter, “You need to know. I prayed. I asked God for this and He provides every time!!” Her mom looks at the pants and in broken English she says, “ I like those!”

Why would God provide the exact pants for a woman who no longer knows her own name? Could it be that He’s speaking directly to her spirit and reminding her that even in her absence of mind that He… HE sustains? He provides? He hears? He knows her every need and He will meet her where she is?

IN our deepest needs He is there. I pray that I never get over the fact that He knows each one of us BY NAME and He knows every struggle that we face and He’s with us. Every single one of us. 

Monday, June 9, 2014

I Can’t Look

Today I am exactly like so many parents who are facing a new phase in life that they are SURE that they are not quite prepared for. 

Today marks the last day of elementary school for my girl. Tomorrow she will join her classmates in a little ceremony that declares that she will move forward into…wait for it…

Middle school.

Oh, I can hardly type it. Did I spell it right? I closed my eyes.

I know you are probably thinking, “Just stop. It’s natural! They grow and, yes middle schoolers have lost their minds amidst all of those raging hormones, but she will be FINE! JUST fine!”

Yeah.

Here’s the thing… I have NO idea what the plan is for next year. None! Zip. NADA. Do you hear me? NOTHING.

The school that we are slated to attend is large, and we need special ed classes. The district does not really offer the type of class that best meets her needs once they hit… yep, Middle school.

We have her on a waiting list for a charter school. She’s 15th, which is good and sounds promising, BUT she’s 15th. She’s not IN.

Ok. Yes, I have considered home schooling and it is an option. Kinda.

One of the issues that she faces is that she really NEEDS to be with kids that are typically developing. Yes, I know about Co-ops. I know we can do all kinds of things that helps her be with other kids. It’s just that she WANTS to go to school. She loves it. She wants to be with the teachers and kids and she loves the structure and she’s enjoyed everyday of being there…even when it’s hard and she can’t do what the others do… she loves it.

My friends are sick of me. This is all I have talked about and asked for prayer for since the first day of school this year.

Ya’ll that’s a long time.

They really should break up with me.

You know… I have been claiming in the waiting Isaiah 49:16. “I have you engraved on the palms of my hands and your walls are EVER before me.”

I know God knows the plan. I know He loves us and that His ways are best and that in the waiting we grow and trust Him more.

But there are just days that in a mama heart it’s hard to believe that it’s really all going to come together!! It’s just true. There are times that we don’t believe that He is in control and we think that He’s taking too long to show us His plan.

Yep. We think that. AND What does He do? He just keeps loving us and holding our hands and telling us to trust.

What would be awesome would be a sign…. A neon sign with a big arrow hanging over the location would be awesome! OR a big BUSH could just catch on fire near the school of His choice would help!

It could happen.

You know, in the scheme of things this decision is big, but it’s not going to be the death of us if we have to wait. We may even have to start in a place that we didn’t think we would and just keep our eyes on Jesus until He shows us.

I just might have a couple of meltdowns between now and then.

Yesterday in Sunday school we talked about making decisions out of our emotions vs. making decisions out of what we KNOW to be true.

What I know is that God has a plan for our lives (Jeremiah 29:11) and  that He is with us where ever we go (Joshua 1:9). I also know that He said in Isaiah that our children will be taught by THE LORD and great will be our children’s peace. AND I know that He is sovereign and that He is always on time. ALWAYS.

You ever wonder if He waits on us to quit having meltdowns so He can speak? Because I also know that He speaks in a still small voice and when I have a meltdown, sister… I have a MELTDOWN!

So, here we go. Summer’s coming and we have no plan. I guess this is the adventure of walking with Christ and trusting His hand when we can’t see His plan.

Wait! Is that smoke in the distance!?

Tuesday, June 3, 2014

Life Changing

One year, one month and eighteen days ago I went to Africa.

We always hear stories about the lives of people in third world countries and about how hard their lives are just making it from day to day.

We hear about extreme poverty and about the hardships of living with little food or access to medical care and medicine. Africa 121

It’s very hard to imagine all of it from the comfort of our homes.

I mean, it’s impossible really. There was no real point of reference for me because of the life that I’ve lived since my birth in the United States of America. I have always had a loving family, a home, clothing, the best medical care and an opportunity to have 3 meals a day.

From that context it’s extremely hard to relate to the fact that children live in dirt huts with few clothes, little running water and with AIDS running rampant in their homes, communities and sometimes in their own little bodies.

Africa 164

 

And then you go.

And… well, it’s just real.

The stories are true.

Africa 070

The faces are precious and the hearts are tender and in need of love and hope that someone genuinely cares about their needs… especially their need for Jesus.

Africa 047There are people that are there Africa 040

who are telling them about Christ. They are working and sacrificing a life with many luxuries to live among the people of Africa. Their hearts are for the people who might not know the truth were it not for their obedience to go and tell them.

Africa 197Africa 184

It will be an honor for me to return to Africa in October of this year. My prayer is that we will be able to minister to these who are living a life that is very different from the lives they’ve always known. I am praying that our team of ten will be able to encourage their hearts and come along side them in a time of refreshment for both the missionary parents and kids!

If you are around a person in need or who is not well for very long you know the kind of toll it can take on you mentally, physically and spiritually. It’s extremely hard to see suffering and to know that there’s very little that you can do to solve all of the issues at hand. You need help!  You need resources and finances and support.

As the church, we HAVE to be those things to those who are taking such strong steps of faith to choose to live in those conditions daily. We may not be able to do everything, but we CAN do something.

I love that our church has taken on the mentality and mission to live according to God’s Word and to LIVE SENT every day. Our ministers are challenging us to look beyond ourselves and to see the needs around us in our community and around the world.

Something happens to you when you begin to live in a way that gets your eyes off of yourself. So much of it involves the realization that your life REALLY isn’t so bad. Other things that come to light… you have so much to offer, when you know Christ you have hope that transcends even the hardest of circumstances and the things of this world become very small in the light of His glorious grace.